Yankee Narwhal
- Mom: Bye Buddy! Hope you find your dad!
- Dad: That's a little to Northern of an accent for that. You're like a Yankee Mr. Narwhal!
- Mom after a great pause: I outta kick you right in the groin right now!
Change your hair!
- Mom: I'm gonna change my hair and git to painting...
- Me: What are you...Dolly Pardon?
- Mom: ............I mean...CLOTHES!
Organic spinach salad topped with organic yellow peppers, tuna with Nayo (yes, Nayo…organic soy Mayo!) dried dates, dill, spices, and organic gingerly dressing = Lunch of Champions
Dang it. 17-9?! C’MON GIANTS!!!!!!! You totally could have blocked that touchdown! WHAT THE HECK. CATCH UP! You’re Giants!! ACT LIKE IT!
Broken heart, good place to start. How do we change the world without being torn apart? So we run, we run, and what do we find? We find we’re running clear out if time. Out of our minds - no, we’re not confined, we’re not denied, we’re comfortable. Confused. Caught up. It’s gotta stop. We gotta go back to the beginning of it all; back to madness, sadness, and give away all our gladness. So whats your opinion? That we somehow deserve freedom? Or that everyone everywhere belongs in the Kingdom? Let it haunt your heart till you’re moved into action, don’t ever stop; don’t lose your traction. How else is it gonna happen? You. Me. We.
Palamoney
- This is a joke:
- Mom: I want a divorce.
- Dad: You think that'll help everything?
- Mom: I want the house, child support, and palamoney.
- Dad: That's a horse, ain't it?
- Mom: Lol, naw.
- Dad: I'm thinking of palomino pony.
Oh man, what are we gonna do with you…us…me…what’s gonna happen to us?
- 2, 4 year old boys to their dad: Are you gonna tape us together or what?
- Dad: I am taping you together, right now.
- Boy: But you're not using tape, dad!
- Dad: No, I meant video tape you two together!
